Orange-Glazed Tempeh and Fighting Fires

12 Mar

I know my thighs are the topic of discussion way more than they ought to be. For unemployed, inanimate objects, they sure get lots of attention. It’s because they’re always causing trouble. Like busting through my jeans. Or clamping onto necks. Or taking out innocent gym shorts.

Running Shorts

Not gym shorts!! NO!

I hate shorts. I really do. They’re not made for folks with aggressive thighs. My thighs see a pair of shorts and immediately go into attack mode, like a hungry piranha. My thighs gobbles those shorts up until they cry out for mercy! And frankly, it’s just embarrassing.

Today I forgot my running pants and had to wear these little itty bitty gym shorts. Not a pleasant run, I tell ya. Last time I had a run in with gym shorts, I ended up with chaffed thighs for two weeks. SERIOUS I tell you! Anyway, when I got home from my nylon showdown, I was super hungry, even though I’d already scarfed down two of these chocolate cherry muffins on the way home.

A couple of days ago, a coworker passed me a recipe from some cookbook for Orange-glazed tofu, but I wasn’t in the mood for tofu. So I made orange-glazed tempeh. I regret that I didn’t let it marinate. I regret even more that I put in so much crushed red pepper. Now my lips are burning along with my AG thighs. Perhaps it’s time for bed. Put out the fire between my legs and lips with a lovely dream about oceans and really, really cold milk.

Damn thighs.

What I Used
2/3 cup orange juice
2 tablespoons mushroom soy sauce
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
1 tablespoon maple syrup
1/2 tsp red pepper flakes

8 oz tempeh
1 tbsp olive oil
A whole mess of garlic, minced
1/2 small onion, slice
1 green pepper, sliced

Peppers and Onions

What I Did

I always steam my tempeh in the microwave before cooking with it. I find it gets rid of that bitter thing tempeh sometimes does in the mouth. It can be disturbing. 10 minutes in the microwave with water and saran wrap and it all goes away. After that, I sliced the block in half longwise, and then sliced the two pieces into 8 sections creating 16 “strips”. Set these aside.

Sliced Tempeh


Mix all the ingredients together for the sauce and set aside. Heat the olive oil on medium high heat. Add the onion and peppers and cook until translucent and tender. Add the tempeh and fry for a bit. If I had been more ambitious, I would’ve friend the tempeh first, then set aside so that it was more browned, but ehhh. It turned out just fine. Add the sauce and cook 10-12 minutes.


I served it over leftover ride medley from Trader Joe’s. As I said, I should’ve marinated the tempeh first (I would say, a half hour post steaming), but it’s edible and tasty even without marinating. And most importantly, on this day, it was very, very quick.

Orange-Glazed Tempeh



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